What movies have not aged well?

-Comedy gay hitmen Mr Wint and Mr Kidd

-Bond’s idea of placating Goodnight after being forced to hide in the cupboard all night while he’s making out with Miss Anders is to tell her that her time will come soon…

Moonraker

Is TikTok becoming a platform for soft porn?

-Two words. Mickey Rooney.

-J W Pepper

Goldfinger

Where did Noah build the Ark? Was it in a desert or near water?

-”She is very sexyful!”

On Her Majesty’s Secret Service

Live and Let Die

How did the Nazis figure out whether a person or community is 'Aryan' or not?

-What was with the over-acting of the French guy Mayday kills in the Eiffel Tower? Been watching too much Allo Allo?

-Bond disguised as a Japanese fisher looks exactly like - Sean Connery wearing a bad wig.

-”Quarrel. Fetch my shoes!”

If I only have a fire extinguisher to defend myself against some threat from people, should I spray them for max damage or just hit them with the fire extinguishers?

From Russia With Love

A View to a Kill

Breakfast at Tiffany’s

Why is it common for guys to sleep with 10-20 women then marry a good girl?

-Bond getting rough with Miss Anders, and slapping her. Christ!

-Bond slaps Tania pretty hard, and gets rough with her when he tries to get her to confess what her orders were.

-”Ah so!”

Why does my ex boyfriend do this?

Dr No

-The comedy French taxi driver, also over-acting. Someone doesn’t like the French…

The Man with the Golden Gun

Its year 2041, and president Hunter Biden has ordered every republican who sweared at him to be arrested and shot. I am on my way to the death row listening to the cheer of the Liberal mob chanting death death death. How can I escape?

You Only Live Twice

-All the bad guys are black.

-Bond forcing himself on Pussy.

Why do we let ugly men exist?

-Bond tricks the virginal Miss Solitaire into having sex with him.

-”Why do Chinese girls taste different to all other girls?”

-Note how the next couple of ones were ….well…as grounded in reality as you can be with Bond.

Why has my ex moved on so fast after years of being together with me?

-Bond getting slaphappy again, this time with Tiffany Case.

Octopussy

-Tracy’s father having uh…interesting ideas about what a happy marriage should be. Hell, he punches her out at one point.

Why am I so tired of the keto diet?

-In the second half of Daylights, Bond gets aid from Afghan guerrillas. Rambo III is set against the same backdrop of the Soviets’ campaign in Afghanistan, getting help from the brave, starry-eyed, bold, freedom-loving peasant patriots against the cruel rapey Russians, and it even ends with a dedication to the mudjaheddin.

-Choo Me? Hai Fat?

The Living Daylights & Rambo III

Where's the Civil War everyone on the left said would happen?

-Bond slapping Tracy.

-”That should keep you in curry…” said to an Indian agent.

Diamonds Are Forever